The Price of honesty

Looking at a document just now I found something which was said slightly objectionable, so I responded to the sender saying what I thought. I wondered about doing this because if you continually speak your mind you can become in other peoples eyes the kind of person who is simply opinionated for the sake of it. The term "Wally" in the possibly now defunct world of CB radio meant a person who habitually dived in on other people's conversations. We have all experienced the situation at the end of a long and laborious meeting when we have almost crossed the finishing line and someone, like Colombo, the TV detective from the '70s says : "just one more thing" and the meeting lurches on.

I never want to be that person, the irritating thorn in the side for everyone else, the outspoken know it all, however I have spent a lot of my life not speaking when I should have done and never want to do that again.

The Lord keep me from being a bore, but even more  from being a coward.

Running revelation

Out for a run this morning I was pondering on Ephesians chapter 1 verse 2
:  "Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ." 
i have often wondered how Paul could so confidently give a blessing from God, not from himself but God. It seems a rather presumptuous thing to do. On thinking about it, I realised that not only had Paul the right to say it but that I have the right to say it too. After all what is prayer but moving God's hand, what is faith but the knowledge that you have already received the answer? Jesus said in John 14. "And whatever you ask in My name, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son." 

Paul could have dressed up the sentence to make it apparent that it was a prayer but he cut right to the chase. Believing prayer receives at the same time as it prays, otherwise it is simply hoping into unseen blackness. 

I wouldn't in any way aspire to the faith of Paul, however I do possess the faith that God has given me. I can speak a blessing.

As I thought about this my mind went to the passage where Jesus tells us to pray for our enemies (Matthew 5: 43-48)  "But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven;" and I realised that Jesus was using the exaggerated way of speaking that he sometimes did to reinforce his point. It's hard to imagine forgiving an enemy who has, hurt a family member, or done horrible things in times of war, so a lot of us conclude that we don't measure up, however think about this: the disciples said "who is my neighbour?", could we not equally say "who is my enemy?". That being the case we discover that we have a multitude of enemies, those who thwart our plans, misunderstand us, hurt us, mess up our situation, in fact at certain times our nearest and dearest seem to be more enemies than friends. 

These are the ones we have the power to bless with God's blessing through the authority of faith, if we do this to our "friends" then we will gain the grace to do it to our enemies thus demonstrating that we are children of God.

Update

Update

I haven't blogged for ages and feel I should start up again, so a brief resume of what has happened for the last 15 months or so. At the beginning of 2015 I got an illness that I was unable to shake off I lost getting on for two stone. It turned out to be (apparently) nothing much although it didn't seem like it at the time. The week before I returned to work, Debbie and I went away for a week which I have not done for the last 40 odd years. The chance to reflect and seek God whilst gently relaxing was pretty life changing. 2015 was overshadowed by the unexpected death of Jonathan Wren in July and getting accustomed to life without him trying to support the grieving family. I upped my running mileage around that time but my hopes of keeping up 10 miles a week regularly did not come to fruition.

On 28th December I bought a banjo having an inspiration more or less out of nowhere to start learning it, thinking some of my guitar playing skills would transfer. Maybe they do, but two months in and it's a steep learning curve, I have drastically reduced my reading and practice up to an hour a day, more if I have the time. It's a slow process. If I can work out how to post videos on this blog I will map my progress.

Watch this space.

Wealth Money and all that Jazz,

A couple of weeks ago on a Sunday morning one of our Pastors spoke about giving. I enjoyed it, (the communication was very good). The whole area of wealth is a bit of a minefield and I thought the brother who spoke very wisely avoided making comments about riches and rich people. Funny though how we always look at things according to our own viewpoint (and that must be the only way we can look at them) some in the meeting had a different viewpoint than me and interpreted the message differently. Rather than criticising those people I should first take a walk in their shoes.

I have never had any money to speak of but I have never been in poverty. My parents were poor but very generous. They taught me that money and posessions are to be held lightly. As a result of my upbringing and my choices as an adult I see money as a means to an end. I never wanted to be rich. I remember how I left my first job (in a Bank, no less). I was called for some kind of reveiw at head office. I hadn't started doing my Bankers diploma. The reason for this was basically that I was still a kid at seventeen, afraid of everyone and everybody and the thought of study after a dozen perplexing years at school didn't do it for me. I didn't know how to learn and wonder how I ever got any O levels. The Bank wanted people who wanted to advance. I told the person (or it may have been a couple of people) that I wasn't really interested in money and they suggested I resign, which I did.

At the age of 23 I moved into common purse community. Our vision was relative poverty so we got by. I have sometimes gone weeks without spending any money. I have never lacked, have never had to wonder where the next meal was coming from.

There are positive and negative spin offs from this lifestyle. I perhaps, freed from the responsibility of making ends meet taken a lot longer to grow up than I would otherwise have done, on the other hand I have learned to hold loosely the things that I can't carry with me into eternity of which money is one. I want to emulate my parents. They gave generously and in turn they received bountifully.

I have no Bank account and as far as I can only spend what I need to. What then do I think of riches? Jesus says make friends for yourself with money and he also says that if we do not act honourably with money who will give us the true riches. It also says that God will provide all my need according to his riches in Christ Jesus. I am happy with that. My antecedents have established my viewpoint.

What of another person with a different history? How can I walk in their shoes? Maybe they grew up in poverty desperate just to have enough. To escape poverty and live free from the gnawing anxieties generated by lack has driven them to seek financila stability and abundance. Should I label them as a heretic, someone who embraces prosperity teaching and therefore have nothing to do with them or should I try to understand? There is such a problem when we make it our life's work to attack what other people are doing, to label everyone who does not accord perfectly with how we do things as somehow under God's judgement. No. We may of course be unable to agree, we may not find ourselves able to inhabit the same space churchwise because of our differences. We have got to look for agreement, what can we encourage in each other; what can we DO together to establish God's kingdom on earth?

From that sermon a couple of Sundays ago I remember one main thing: What we give financially to the work of the Church has to be what we have decided in our own hearts.

The Willow Tree

The Willow Tree stands by the water, not the tallest, never stronger -

Than mighty pines and oaks that grow taller and live longer

Yet flexible her branches, her swaying limbs as the wind blows

-That stormy destroying wind which picks up larger trees and downward throws-

Is cut into a thousand pieces by the whipping branches and reduced to a whispered hiss

By the little leaves resistless motion. The storm is stilled by this.

I've been there

I've let the side down
Gone against the tide - down
From where I had their trust
To grovelling in the dust
From Alpha to Anathema
From healthy to a carrier
Of disease and I have been
In solitary quarantine.
I've been there.

I've been on the other side
In me the others can't confide
'Cause I'm not Kosha anymore
And I must wait outside the door
Until my penance is complete
And I can stand upon my feet
I have betrayed those that I serve
And I have got what I deserve.
I've been there.

And there I found him
Smeared with other people's sin
And mine - I know he saw, he knew
The pain that I'd been going through
Did what I'd done even evince
From his bruised soul an extra wince?
I'd nailed him up, joined in the kill
But I knew, slowly, dawningly,
He loved me still.

Composed whilst helping in Bridge drop in 16/7/14

                                                    Better than nothing

 I live somewhere, it's not home
It's just somewhere to be
I suppose I should be grateful
I'm not on the streets
It isn't special
But it's better than nothing.

I go to a place in the mornings
And eat beans on toast
Bread from Sainsbury's
That they couldn't sell
It's not my choice
But it's better than nothing.

They give me clothes
I can get a shower
Use the phone, talk to people
They aren't my friends
Just other people who go there
But it's better than nothing

I'm on Benefits JSA
I've been inside
I won't get a job
But I pretend to look
So I won't get my money stopped
The money is a joke
But it's better than nothing.

I've got a kid, don't see him
His mum's a bitch
We split up
I've got a new partner, she's a pain
I don't love her
But it's better than nothing.

I drink a bit, but don't take drugs
I'm not a junkie
I'm better than that
I drink this cider
It's never seen the inside of an apple
But it's better than nothing.

I'm not happy
But I like the footy, I used to play
But it didn't work out
I didn't fit in
I only watch it on T.V. now.
But it's better than nothing.

Why do I keep going?
Something won't let me stop
I duck and dive
Watch my back
I wouldn't call it life
But it's better than nothing

I'm not special, noone cares
My Dad left, my Mum died
I don't see my family
They don't like me
I have acquaintances, not friends
But it's better than nothing.