Bank Holiday weekend and Martin Jamieson

This weekend some of us from Anchorage are camping out at Bugbrooke Chapel during the alive weekend. Guys downstairs in the Chapel itself, ladies in the upper room. That takes me back to when I was about 16 or 17 and I was going with a group of other young people to the lake district. For some reason we stayed overnight in a Church hall in London (I was living in the south of England at the time). Lads were one end of this hall, girls the other with a generous number of responsible adults to make sure there was no hanky panky. Sleeping on the floor has never been conducive to restful nights and the floor was making aggressive moves towards my hip bone. I was next to my friend Jamie. Suddenly in the half light we saw a sleeping bag from the girls side kind of wriggling across the room. It was one of the girls who had taken a fancy to my friend. I think that she thought people would think she was sleep rolling. When she was a few yards away, Jamie said "I'm off" and headed towadrs the toilets. I sat up and said to the girl "we have been watching your progress with interest". Then an adult intervened and that was that fun over. I do not expect we shall have anything like that level of excitement at the chapel. i wonder if the girl (who would now be mid 50's) remembers it with embarrassment. Jamie has changed his name (no connection!) still in touch.

Summer days

The winter is a distant memory and everything is warming up. I am not one of those people who get all excited about summer but at the moment the weather is conducive to feelings of wellbeing. The garden is lovely. We had a barbeque this evening and the children were playing together on the lawn. Maybe life is not so gloomy after all. Summer is the season of fruit and hope perhaps April is spring still. If so it's good.

The right timing.

Last week Debbie and I went to see my Uncle and his family on their small holding in Kent. I remember with fondness visiting as a child and it is good to see that it hasn't changed much, still quite a "Darling buds of May" flavour. Today I recalled an incident which happened when I visited many years ago. My Uncle has always been good with cattle, taking various prizes at shows up and down the country. One day I was with him in the pasture and he was inspecting a particular animal. This animal had a lump on it. This was caused by a fly larvae which had I believe been licked off its legs by the aminal. My uncle got this out by prodding and pinching and then crushed it.

I may have remembered some details wrongly but that was the gist. It strikes me that sometimes life mirrors the Botfly scenario, you've got to wait until things come to a head before you deal with them.I guess even when you take precautions the odd egg gets swallowed, a foreign body at large. But waiting and watching can lead to it being sorted.

Other people's choices

One of the difficult areas of my life is the amount of control I have over others. The whole area of responsibility is a major issue. If I take responsibility for another person it can mean that they cease to take responsibility for themselves, then when I try to return responsibility to them they can blame me for the situation they are in, wheras if I took no responsibility in the first place I would have had no problem apart from maybe a failure to show any compassion.
People I care about make choices which affect others whom I also care about. Although in an ideal world one should not be judgemental I find myself making judgement calls and choices which mean that nobody wins and one or more people ends up hating me, or feeling that I hate them, because I have taken responsibility.

I guess that it is better to attempt to love and care and be disappointed than to be hard and callous.